Gratitude

*blow dust* Hi guys! Sorry for breaking my promise to blog 'soon'. Again -_- But I'm back anyway! Before you continue reading this post, please note that this post do not have any pictures. Not even ONE, so if you know you will get annoyed reading reading and reading, please DO NOT continue. Thank you :)

So yeah, here comes my favourite day out of the month. It's 27th again and I can't believe we have came so far, together. It's like a dream (nightmare sometimes :p) Even though it is not the lovey-dovey kind of relationship and things get hard, but I'm still thankful because the good would always, always pop out to remind me what a blessing are you to me :)

And so, this is my post about gratitude.

Gratitude, is the quality of being thankful, readiness to show appreciation for and return to kindness that has been received. Gratitude, thankfulness, gratefulness and appreciation is what I've mostly experience in this 2 weeks :)

As some of you know, (if you read my previous post HERE) I'm officially employed, and I started working on the 17th of March 2014. Mark this date, I'm not sure if it is gonna be rough, or tough or stressful, or all of the above *sudden meltdown* But since I've taken up this job, I believe that God will lead me through this.

Indeed. God is so good, He granted me a bunch of wonderful colleagues to work with :D Although I still don't know them much, but I can't thank them enough for being so welcoming since my first day of work. I still remember how nervous I am on my first day, afraid that I can't get up on time, afraid that I will be late on my first day of work. Not knowing what to do, not knowing where to go, not knowing how to carry myself in a place that I know no one.

On Monday morning, I woke up so early, before the alarm even rang! ( I set my alarm at 7am and I woke up wayyyyyy early than that) which can be considered as MIRACLE! Sleepyhead I know. I reach my workplace around 8.30am and went straight to the Human Resources office. No picture allowed sorry :( And why would I take picture on my first day? I saw a girl, sitting there alone miserably, waiting for someone to attend to her. And so I joined her. Just because she look extremely familiar but I couldn't remember her name. *felt so old :(

I was looking at her all the time. I'm not a stalker and I don't always stare at people, just so you know. Unless he/she is super attractive :p I guess she feels the same because I caught her looking at me a few times too. After 15 minutes of total boredom and awkwardness, we had a so call, briefing. I finally remembered who she is after the self introduction!

Turns out, she's Sara! One of my Uni close friend's friend. We met 4 years ago through my friend and we hang out few times together after that, but ever since my friend went off to pursue her degree, Sara and I lost contact and never met each other anymore. To be honest, I might totally forgot about her if I didn't met her again after this dramatic, long 4 years. I was so shocked and happy, never knew that I would meet a long lost friend here, things suddenly seems to be brighten up and I've found myself a lunch partner! hahaha so lame.

As soon as I was brought to my office, my manager came straight up to me and introduce herself which is really impressive :) When the clock hits 12, and I am ready to look for Sara for lunch, my colleagues came to me and invite me to join them for lunch :') Guess they know (or saw) how miserable I am :p All these that happened on my first day made a great impact and brought out the confident in me. I know I have to do my best because I'm on the right track that God put me at. And He will always be with me and lead me :)

With all these blessing that I've received, I decided to start keeping a Gratitude Journal :) Believe it or not, it has been only a week since I started but I already benefit from this! Frankly speaking, I am difficult. Difficult to please, difficult to be cheered up when I'm down. I am not that kind of person who will wake up and yawnnnnn, then say it's gonna be a good day! Even though I don't think anyone, especially working adults will think/say that. Negative thoughts was taking over me, bit by bit without me noticing, I don't speak, joke or laugh that much anymore. I'm being more and more sarcastic and mean to people around. I became the person that I once hated the most.

And of course, I realize the changes in me and I always pray to change to be better, but the next day when I woke up, I am still the person that I am the last night, this drives me crazy. I never want to hurt anyone with my words but I did. I never want to be rude to my parents, but I pissed them off again and again. I was so disappointed with myself at one point and as I am scrolling through my Instagram, looking at all the nice pictures, happy faces and prayers for #MH370, I was wondering why am I so upset with my own life? I'm only 22 (21 and 3 months to be exact :p and yeah I just had to) I still have so many things to do, to try, to explore in my life. I should not be like this anymore.

If the only prayer you say in your life is 'thank you', that would suffice.

Gratitude definitely heightens the quality of life, but first, what is gratitude?

Gratitude means thankfulness, counting your blessings, noticing simple pleasures, and acknowledging everything that you receive. It also means learning to live your life as if everything were a miracle. Gratitude can shifts my focus from what my life lacks to the abundance that is already present. And I'm pretty sure that it will shift yours too :) I've learnt to give thanks and appreciation to everyone that helped me, even if it's the slightest thing. Giving thanks makes me happier and more resilient, moreover, it also strengthens my relationship with my parents, friends, colleagues and loved ones :) It makes me more happy and cheerful, and as crazy as it sounds, it does reduce stress too!

It is amazing how one simple, easy and positive action can change so much in a person's life. The realization of the power of gratitude has brought the biggest effect to me. It has made me a more positive person, a more productive person, a better daughter, friend and colleagues (to me, at least) No one is perfect and no one will ever be, but gratitude, can make us all better, make the world a better place to live in.

Of course, I'm not here to brag about how good I've became. I still get frustrated from time to time, all of us will encounter those bad days, such as get yelled at by someone, stressed about work, school, assignments etc etc, but always remember, one of the things that can make a screwed up day better is making a list of all the things that you're thankful for. There are always something to be thankful for, such as your loved ones, having a job, having a car, healthy body. In fact, we should be thankful for life itself.

Everyday, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive,

I have a precious human life,

I am not going to waste it. 

I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others, 

to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings. 

I am going to have kind thoughts towards others,

I am not going to get angry or think badly about others.

I am going to benefit others as much as I can.

Gratitude should not be just a reaction to get what you want, but an all-the-time gratitude, the kind where you notice all the little things and where you constantly look for the good even in unpleasant situations. 

I figure life's a gift and I don't intend on wasting it. 

You don't know what hand you're gonna get dealt next.

You learn to take life as it comes at you...

To make each day count.

Till then,

xx